I honestly feel like what’s fucking up with my emotions so badly is how I’ve been deprived of my love, the game.

I hate being torn apart from it. Everything just doesn’t feel right. I want it back.

I need to really focus and set a plan for myself somehow so that I can make it a possibility for me to either travel to LA every once in a while or I really need to move because I NEEEEED capoeira. I need it so badly.I have not been happy at all. I’ve felt so lonely. I miss the energy. I miss it so much.

Some people are just so toxic. I’m glad I removed myself from the situation though. Sometimes I do honestly start to think I might have some bit of regret in leaving so soon, but part of me knows that I couldn’t stay and be treated the way that I was. It isn’t right. Not all groups are like that.

I guess what I’ve realized is that I truly am in love with Capoeira. and I can’t be away from it too long, because I start to lose myself. Is that bad? I don’t know. But I’m excited for Saturday :)